Thursday, February 05, 2015

Nailed It!

Here we are on the other side of a year.  As my friend Becky said, "Well, that's done, but it will never be over," and she is exactly right.  I am glad it's done, and I know it will never be over, and that's just how my world is.  It's up to me to ensure that the never-over part doesn't take over.

Thank you again to everyone who reached out, in myriad ways, to us over the past week, month, and even year.  I felt it all.

Now we're out of the "newly-grieved" year, which in some ways felt a little like that first year after marriage, where you are dodging all kind of questions like, "so now that you're married...?" except that we have been dodging sad looks and awkward conversations.  The fact is, you still may not know what to say to me, and I still don't know what to say back.  Say you are sorry.  I will tell you I am too.

On my morning walk with Jack, I realized that I've been in a real, honest to God quagmire about work.  It's been quiet work-wise for a while and I'm starting to lose faith.  While walking in the clear sunshine this morning, I had a little bit of an epiphany.  I really, really love being a Realtor.  I love helping people, and I love homes, and I truly believe that this is a good match for me.  But I'm so mired down in sadness I struggle on a daily basis to get moving, get motivated, and get things done.

How do I drain the swamp so I can move again?

Really, how?  I'm not sure as I'm as new to this as anyone would be. I'm going to try.  The first part will be simple.  Set some goals for each day and don't stop until they are accomplished.  Personal goals and professional goals.  Stepping stones to the bigger goals.  Get up.  Get dressed.  Clean up after breakfast.  Have a dinner plan.  Make sure you respond to clients. Make sure you talk to at least 4 people each day to see if they need any real estate help.  Make sure you get professional reading finished.

The hardest goal is this: get up.  I have been a night owl since basically the beginning of time.  Now, it's hard to go to sleep until after midnight and the mornings are still coming at me, requiring me to be pleasant and functional and motivated.  With little sleep, none of those are likely.  Mostly I manage functional right now.

I'm also going to add in one more.  Write a paragraph a day.  I woke up on January 31 with a sentence in my head that seemed like the start of something bigger.

3 comments:

Sharon Sobel: The Multi-Faceted Maven said...

Colleen, I understand what you're going through work-wise. December through February are typically very slow for me. But that's the key word: TYPICALLY. Which means even though I may not like it, I have learned over the years, that I don't need to carry self-doubt, I have to just understand that it is the nature of the business. You are doing all the right things in trying to focus on accomplishments- even if they aren't work related. This is also a good time to explore other ways of marketing that you can carry through to when you ARE busy. Just don't make foolish decisions that carry you down a road not related to what you love doing just so you can feel success in some other way. This (like everything else) too shall pass.

Colleen said...

I was looking for a "like" button :)

Toby Chieffo-Reidway said...

I'm having the same scheduling problem- I go to bed at 2am- and do all my class planning, photography, cleaning etc.. At night then I am exhausted and unmotivated during the morning to do the things I need to do like exercise and be awake- it is a vicious cycle! Because then you have to rest during the day if you can and then that makes you perky at night! Drives my hubby crazy!