Wednesday, April 10, 2013

Dreams...

So last night (okay, okay, this morning when I fell back asleep when I should have been up!) I dreamt about Connor.  I do not usually dream about him, but when I do it's a very uplifting experience. 

Last night/this morning's dream centered around him sitting in Tucker's room.  Tucker was playing with him, throwing stuffed animals around for him to track.  All of the sudden, Connor broke out into the most enormous smile I have ever seen.  He laughed and laughed and laughed.  I ran in to the room and grabbed the only camera I could find, which was the toy one Tucker got for Chirstmas, which has an approximate pixel setup of 1 pixel by 1 pixel.  But I was determined to get a picture of this event. 

I woke up happy, and wishing I really had the picture.

Back 4 years ago, as I waited for Tucker to be born while living in Tiny House, I dreamt that Connor came walking, almost running, out of the screened porch, across the yard and into the street.  Nothing bad happened.  He was just moving, and looking amazed with himself.  It seemed, in the dream, that he knew he could walk all along and he just decided to do it.  There he went! It was fantastic.  I woke up so happy that day too.  I love that in my dreams, when he does stuff, it's the things we all wish he could do, and that doing them makes him so happy.

I don't really remember dreaming about the other boys.  Perhaps that's because they get to live out the dreams all around me.  But given the strange dreams I've had through my whole life (Jerry Garcia as Lamaze instructor, anyone?) these are the ones I cherish the most, and will keep record of for those days when I need a pick me up.  I didn't need one today, but who knows when the next day will come when I do?

Take care out there, friends.  Let your dreams fly, and try to live them.

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