Friday, May 24, 2013

Good-byes run both ways

It's been a crazy couple of weeks.  I apologize for the lack of posting but life, and work, has been busy and at the end of the day I am not really able to string the words together to make it worthwhile for anyone to read.

Last Friday, we received a call that Connor is being moved to a different school next year.  Initially, and in an ongoing way, we are happy.  We have been at odds with his school for the last two years and are looking forward to a little more peace in his education.  But what I've learned in the last week is that it seems a few things have been going on behind the scenes that make me seethe.  It seems that the administration of his current school pushed this issue.  They don't appear to like that they have a section of their school dedicated to disabled children when there are so many able children who need the space.  Ugly stuff.  But on the other hand, I'm no fan of the administration there.  I look forward to establishing a relationship with the new principal.  But also, and most importantly, the schools and adminstrations are not supposed to make any decisions regarding school placement without parental or guardian involvement.  Which they did not do.  At all.  With anyone.

It's hard to know what line to walk on here.  As Connor's number one advocate, do I stand up and hold the adminstrations accountable for not abiding by the regulations, even though their circumventing it and placing him elsewhere actually looks to be the best outcome for Connor?  My friends/parents in the system are angry, and rightfully so.  I am angry that they flouted the regulations.  But I am angrier at the shitty, thoughtless approach to my son that his school has "bestowed" upon him. 

So that's a good-bye that won't be too hard.

Then, on the other side, there's our Megan.  When Connor was 8 months old, the Arlington PIE Program called to tell me that he had been reassigned to a new physical therapist and they were really excited because it was the person they had wanted all along.  I got a call soon after from this new woman, and we set up our first appointment.  When she arrived at our house, she plopped down on the floor with him, and started performing some stretches with him so she could learn how and where he worked so their time together would be better focused.  He'd been having some issues with constipation that had me incredibly stressed out, and about 5 minutes into the stretches, he started wiggling, then passing gas, and then, by the end of the 45 minute session, taking care of that business. 

She came into our home, and took something that was blocked up and helped us find a way around it.  In a real way, but also in a more esoteric, atmospheric way. 

We have not been the same since, and it absolutely breaks my heart that her family is moving away on an amazing adventure and we won't see her much any more.  Simultaneously, I am so excited for them.  We have been so fortunate to have her in our lives.  Not only Connor, but Lee, Drew, Tucker and me too.  She has loved my family unconditionally, and we love hers.  Let's put this another way:  my mother knits baby blankets for family members when new babies are on the way.  When I told her that Megan's first baby was on the way, her response was, "Find out what color she wants.  Megan gets a Wooby." 

She is family, and we will miss her.  And hopefully, we will go visit them all when the time is right for everyone! 

This good-bye is much, much harder.

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